My daughter, recently an unconserved adult, is now being visited by both of my parents. That is NOT a typo. Consequently, I have decided the following:
- I no longer need nor do I want to know about her relationship with my family. Period.
- Do not bring it up in discussion.
- It’s none of my business.
If I had to give myself a grade for how I prepared her for independent living, I’d have to give myself an A+. She is situated quite nicely with all necessary accoutrement so she can thrive. My job is done.
ABOUT BORICUA CONFIDENTIAL©™
Boricua Confidential chronicles my new life as a single mom of two kids after my husband died from cancer on our son’s seventh birthday. Join me on this journey of change, revival, reformation, discovery and new direction ordered of God. Being a widow ain’t easy, that’s for sure. I refuse to rollover and die. Quite the contrary. I intend to thrive from this crazy life. You can’t keep this woman down. If I’m down, I won’t be for long.
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I am getting ready to do the same thing with my oldest, but more gradually since at 19 he is still living at home and may continue to do so through college. Strangely though it seems like he is getting closer to me during this time when others are distancing themselves from parents. Still I am learning to relate to him as a fellow adult rather than as a child and am finding that a delight. Sounds like you have a wonderful daughter, and I am looking forward to the day my son becomes truly independent in his own home.
Sounds very good that you have/are learning to distance yourself from your daughter and her relationship with other people – even though they are people from your own family.
She does have a right to get to know them on her own terms, to like or dislike them as seems best to her. It’s a wise parent who can acknowledge that and step back.